• I didn’t like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.• Did you hear about the cross-eyed teacher who lost her job because she couldn’t contro... her pupils?• When you get a bladder infection, urine trouble.• I dropped out of communism class because of lousy Marx.• I got a job at a bakery because I kneaded dough.• Velcro - what a rip off!• Don’t worry about old age; it doesn’t last.HOW MOSES GOT THE 10 COMMANDMENTSGod went to the Arabs and said, ‘I have Commandments for you that will make your. Jim, if you’ll take over the meeting.”Clearing his throat, Jim said, “John left a copy of his will with me that was dated four months ago and duly witnessed by three observers. It’s a very simple will, far simpler than most wills.”Ed listened with increasing numbness as Jim proceeded to read the will. John had divided his shares in the family to the other shareholders equally, with the provision that any odd shares go to Ed. Ninety-five percent of future revenues from his patents were to go to. Molly wasn’t saying anything, but she was screaming her head off. Somewhere deep in her brain, a neuron fired at the right time. Even with her screaming, she now had her arms around behind my neck and legs around my waist.As I started moving toward the door, a burly female orderly tried to take her from me.“I wouldn’t. Molly is autistic, very autistic,” I told the nurse. “According to her mom, I’m the only person who can touch her, while conscious, that doesn’t cause her to freak out. The way. . excited?You are excited. Your heart pounding. Your breath quickening. Your skin alive to the cool night air. This is excitement.. . . this is excitement.You are excited.. . . . I am excited.You are being brave.I am being brave.This is an adventure, and you are the hero.This is an adventure. And I am the hero.Feel your power.I feel my power.This alley is yours.This alley is mine.This experience is yours.This experience is mine.And everything that happens in this alley belongs to you.Like a.
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