I definitely still desired him bodily. Listen to me now, don’t you judge me. He may have treated me abominably but I am still a woman and know a goo... looking man when I see one, even if he was the one that made me lose myself esteem, so keep any judgmental thoughts to yourself! I find him physically attractive and I always did and always will. End of.We made embarrassed small talk, k**s, health, usual stuff. Eventually he came to the point.‘I have been so stupid’ he said. Well that much was. She was behind in her rent and facing eviction. As she dressed that morning she realized that her diet of rice, pasta and potatoes the past couple of months had gone to her thighs and butt. It was a tight squeeze into her skirt and blouse. She opted to dress up a bit ad wear her black patent leather high heels instead of flats. Looking into her mirror, she just felt overweight; unappreciated; and hopeless. She wished she had more time to fix her hair and make-up. But then again, it was so hot. "Well it's certainly much ... bigger ... than I'm used to. I grew up in quintessential suburbia: six-lane surface streets with 55 mile-an-hour speed limits and a distinct lack of buildings over two stories tall. Even though I've moved to San Francisco, it's still not nearly as imposing as Manhattan."She rolled her eyes. "I didn't ask about the city per se, but about your trip."I smiled. "Imposing city but lovely people. Well, except for the cranky, impatient ones on the streets and sidewalks.. Make radical changes in how you thought it was going to playout.My life was chugging along pretty normally. I had graduated withhonors from Northwestern University. Then I got a job with anadvertising agency in Chicago. I seemed to have a knack for writing adcopy.After a few years of that I got bored. I was making good money but Iwanted a career.What kind of a career? I wasn't even sure. Writing? Producing? Ihad this vision of myself as being very successful, like Hollywood BigMoney.
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