I want itmore than I am ready to admit. I don't think what I feel for Jim islove, but I find that I am thinking of him having sex with me, often.And ...ear, it disturbs me. I don't feel that I am queer. I don't feelfeminine. I don't try to act feminine, but when he is in me, I feellike a female. When I feel his juices spurt inside my body, at thatmoment in time I would hope that it was possible that I was having hisbaby. It's driving me crazy. I too, love you, and the kids. I don'twant to. I remembered Mary a very young officers wife, although having young lovers she kept them to one at a time. As she was far more discrete than the others I tried to glean ideas from her.This was only for interest of course, in no way was I going to let my husband down by having sex with another man, of committing adultery again! No I’d learnt my lesson from my only lover, but Kenny had awakened my feminine passions and I needed to get relief in some way. Mary told me about the other wives.. I turn to look at Timmy, and he still has his legs apart a little probablyso he does not make a bigger mess in his shorts. "Okay first you spread yourlegs apart a lil bit Kellie." I do as he says but look up to make sureStephanie and Jeff are not watching."I feel weird Timmy with my legs spread apart like a baby." I hear himgiggle like a little girl.He is smiling at me. "Okay now squat down and push and you probably need topee too." I do as he says and I start to push and I feel myself start. Why do you find it so impossible to take seriously the idea that I could possibly be attracted to you? You’re smart, funny, you’ve got a lovely personality, a sweet face and, well, not everyone’s attracted to the Kate Moss/heroine chic type! Anyway, it doesn’t matter to me what you look like, it’s you the person I lo..I’m attracted to. If you don’t like me or something, at least be honest with me and tell me, don’t just hide behind whatever excuses it is you’re making up for yourself. I thought.
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